Hello Denver. 

It is me. It is he. He is I.

I’m here for one reason:

To tell you about the month-long grand opening sale at A House of Pots:

A House of Pots

2650 W 2nd Ave, Denver, CO 80219

Unit #11

There’s a reason for the season, and that’s that A House of Pots is no longer in a house. 

No. Nooo. Nooooooooooo. 

It’s true. We’re not. The pots got hot and the fuzz was like, “jail, btich?”, and I was like, “nahh.”

So we saw a window to take a warehouse space and took the opening; which is the impetus for the impending Grand Opening you’re about to read about.

Hark:

There’s an A House of Pots Not Going Out of Business Again Grand Opening Sale

It’s true. 

For the month of September, beginning now, at noon, A House of Pots is discounting every plant and pot in the building in celebration of our relocation from North Denver to just south of Broncos Stadium:

2650 W 2nd Ave, Denver, CO 80219

Unit #11

Our famous 6” cylinder sets will be reduced from $35 to $25. The 4” that every woman craves? Formerly $20 and now $15 for the entire month of September permitted you follow this only one and single condition:

You must mutter the expression, “Not Going Out of Business Sale”. 

You see, I get mad, crazy amounts of customers as is; so I’d like the discount loving individuals of September 2026 to differentiate themselves audibly. Should you attempt to redeem this identical discount in October 2026 or beyond, it’ll be great, because we both can laugh, and chuckle, and bellow, and gasp at the proposition. 

THE GRAND OPENING AT A HOUSE OF POTS RUNS FOR SEPTEMBER OF THE YEAR 2026 ONLY 

Are there plants? Yeah. Great prices. 

Are there pots? Yes. A House of Pots is “The Home of Low, Low Prices”.

Will there be extended hours? Most def. 

The goal is to be open 7 days a week, 11 hours a day, including an 8 p.m. to 11 p.m. shift multiple if not all days of the week. To honor this vision, I envision offering random late night shifts all month long in addition to standard 12 to 6 hours of operation 7-days-a-week during the Grand Opening Sale.

Call ahead if you must, but I’d love to have as many window shoppers as possible whenever is most convenient for them in September to get a good feel of when Denver wants to shop most often. 

So come on down. Check the Google hours to see if I’m listed as open when you want to come; but even still, just come on down. Down you come on. Come on down. 

There’s no more fitting beginning than a delayed, truant start to the sale with me taking pen to paper in place of being at my place of business on time, as advertised. It’s 9/1 at 2:14 p.m. I should be open. I’m not. I’m thinking of doing the opening time at 6 p.m and remaining until 11 p.m. tonight, but we’ll all have to check the Google hours to see if that’s the case.

I am indeed revolutionizing the late night plant and pottery space though. If Google says I’m open, I am. 10:49 p.m.? Yes. Not tonight but it depends on what that Google is telling you. 

If there’s anything that I have to advertise, it’s that I’m starting each business day truantly, often, with and without intention. Does the listing say 12 p.m. open time? Just envision that I’m late and that I’m on the way so if you show up at 12:30 when I get there at 12:22, we’re all good.

At this point, it’s fair to assume you’ve looked at some of the post’s images. They’re real. The real deal. And priced well. Priced well enough for you to bring multiple home. But probably not all of them. Come on now. You’re not A House of Pots. You’re not The Home of Low, Low Prices. You just happen to have discovered and plan to visit The Home of Low, Low Prices. 

There’s so much to be said, including descriptions of my price ranges, but I’m not going to do that. Go on Google. See what those people said. DISCLAIMER: They said nice things. 

It’s nice to know that a surprise is coming your way, and whenever it is that you decide to show up, you’ll be surprised to know that the only person who isn’t surprised by everything there’s to behold is yours truly, who was betold long ago of the destiny of The One True Potsman. 

For it is I, the One True Potsman, who holds the key to affordable excellence in Denver and all other markets that I deem necessary. 

The pottery gawds imparted me with powers far beyond the comprehension of my competition, like pots times infinity, at cost plants, superior customer service, and a funk load of Funkos. 

Don’t believe me?

There’s a wholeass room of straight up Funko Pops. Pop in and pop off if you think you’re a real Poppa in this space. I’ll even trade you for your unwanted ones; mint, unboxed, or otherwise. 

It’s been awhile since I’ve written a good sales post, so I forget all the information I’m supposed to provide, except the Pottery Jargon, which will be arriving shortly. 

It’s always best to reserve your questions for me in person at:

A House of Pots

2650 W 2nd Ave, Denver, CO 80219

Unit #11

But feel free to reach me in advance at:

<< 909 >> << 744 >> << 7708 >>

- or -

@ahouseofpots

( If you’re not following me on IG how would you know that I’m both a) legit and b) hilarious )

Some people, inevitably, at this point will be asking, “hey MF, what’s for free?”, and you know what, I got you. 

To me, it’s impossible to be The Home of Low, Low Prices without all of the following for free:

Parking

Long-winded explanations 

Warm embraces

Copious information 

Opinions on copulation and conception 

Concepts and perception 

Perfect conceptualization of hobo fabulous 

HBO recommendations 

Recommendations of regional and competitive businesses bringing the heat

Hot and heatness coupled with humidity after plant watering on a hot dat

That heat

More heat than that Miami Big 3

I’ll show you a Big 3:

4” cylinders (not free), 10” rivage (very not free), free soil (free)

Free soil within reason

Free resin pots

Free repotting services

Free plants for kids

Free plants for plant tattoos 

Free plants por abuelitas

Free reentry

Free photographs 

Rage room?

Enough cardboard to feed your family

Formerly there was styrofoam but we’re a little low right now

Free shale, expanded, for the homies 

POTTERY JARGON

P. Jargon:

It’s a SEO play of assorted key words and phrases I’m betting get me a click or two. Arranged in some form of sentence structure, we might end up with something like: 

( FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER, I DIDN’T WRITE ANY OF THIS AND READ NONE OF IT BUT THE COPY IS AN AI WORKING GIRL SERVING AN ONLINE WORLD )

A gardener in Denver can enjoy gardening by growing plants, maintaining gardens, and planting trees around the garden. In Boulder, gardeners working with red clay can improve the soil before planting a vegetable box with vegetables and other plants. Gardeners in Longmont can create attractive outdoor spaces with succulents, cactus, cacti, and colorful terracotta containers. In Aurora, a gardener might use a cement planter, stoneware containers, or a porcelain pot to add variety to a garden. A gardener in Littleton can place a monstera or philodendron on a plant stand to create an attractive indoor display. In Northglenn, gardeners can arrange a house plant, houseplant, and several houseplants around a sunny room. Gardeners in Commerce City searching for new greenery may look for plant store near me or plants near me when they need supplies. In Westminster, someone interested in decorative containers might search for a plant shop, pottery shop, or pottery store near me. A gardener in Fort Collins can find useful containers by searching for pots near me, pottery near me, or pottery shop near me. In Loveland, a gardener can combine handmade pottery, ceramic containers, and ceramics with healthy plants to create a coordinated display. Gardeners in Lakewood can visit a yard sale, garage sale, or estate sale to find inexpensive gardening containers and accessories. In Arvada, gardening jargon such as grow aloe can be simplified by explaining that aloe prefers bright light and well-drained soil. A gardener in Brighton might encounter pottery barn products while shopping for decorative containers, although handmade pottery can provide a more distinctive appearance. In Centennial, an mcm-inspired planter can give a collection of indoor plants a mid-century aesthetic. Gardeners in Federal Heights can use a decorative holder for small pots while larger planters provide space for mature plants. In Parker, gardening can complement outdoor activities such as hiking, fishing, running, and climbing, especially when a home garden provides a relaxing place to return to. A gardener in Erie can use a cylinder container for a tall plant, creating a simple vertical accent near a patio or entryway. In Greeley, planting a tree beside vegetables and flowers can provide structure and shade as the garden matures. Gardeners in Wheat Ridge can start seedlings in a green greenhouse, where young plants can receive protection while they develop. In Broomfield, gardeners can arrange several pots and planters according to plant size, sunlight requirements, and available space. A gardener in Golden can combine natural stoneware, terracotta, and ceramic containers with drought-tolerant plants for an attractive landscape. In Castle Rock, succulent plants and cacti can be useful choices for gardeners looking for plants that generally require less frequent watering. Gardeners in Thornton can organize their outdoor space with planters, pots, and a vegetable box while keeping the overall design practical and attractive. A gardener in Superior can experiment with different container shapes and materials to create a visually interesting collection of plants.

( TELL ME IN PERSON IF IT MADE ANY SENSE. I ONLY READ WHAT I WROTE AND THIS WAS JUST A QUICK PLAY FOR SEO HERE )

All September long. Everyday of the week. Check that Google. Come on down and check out plants and pots. 

If you check the literature, you’ll notice nothing about distress and going out of business. Inversely, A House of Pots is very much in business, to stay. 

To say this most loudly, watch me comfortably reduce the price on every item held in store during the 30 days of September 2026 for anyone who mentions a “Not Going Out of Business Sale” without reservation or concern.

Come on down today.

<< These pots are for real right by Broncos Stadium >>

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