5/7/22 - Plant Mother’s Day - Purchase Pottery and Plants for the Ones You Love

Gardening is a labor of love, and your plant babies are like your children.

Their livelihood and longevity relies on your care, and if you care, take time from your busy Plant Mother’s Day weekend to treat yourself to a new pot or plant, because you’ve earned it.

Hi everybody my name is Ian and I don’t care whether you’re a man or a woman, you can be the plant matriarch of your own home. Plant motherhood isn’t gender specific, and it doesn’t concern itself with trivial matters such as if you have biological children, or if you lack the emotional capacity to empathize lovingly with others.

No, plant motherhood is the special bond a person shares with a photosynthetic friend as it grows and roots itself into our lives, taking up an increasing amount of space in our homes, but never all the oxygen in a room.

Plant moms, houseplant dads, this Plant Mother’s Day is for you. If just for the moment, tell your real children and responsibilities to shove it and jump in the car heading towards North Denver and Highway 36. I’m right off the Pecos exit, but, still, message me for the address:

<< 909 >> << 744 >> << 7708 >>

- or -


All these plants and planters pictured are available for purchase on the weekends, Saturdays and Sundays, on a recurring basis, forever. Find me between 1030 am and 530 pm during my regular hours on the weekends, or reach out about scheduling another time.

In terms of pricing, it doesn’t matter, because no matter the cost, your plant babies are worth it.

Terracotta pottery costs between $1 and $35, which spans from 2.5 inches to 18.1 inches.

Glazed ceramics in all colors can cost anywhere between $5 and $110, currently, ranging between 3 inches and 20 inches.

When customers purchase two or more items, I’m inclined to give them cash discounts, or add some freebies to their orders.

When individuals just want free items and have no intention of exchanging funds for goods and services, I tell them I offer:

Broken pottery, cardboard, styrofoam, garbage, rubbish, terracotta shards, clay pots for tots, occasional cuttings, occasional rescue plants, occasional nursery planters, allusions to that time your mother told you TANSTAAFL, fictitious empathy for anyone who says TLDR, and pottery jargon.

Pottery jargon (gardening search terms):

Usually when I’m runnin this game, I’m hiking through my vocabulary to make sentences and succulent plants and the people that buy them from Thornton, but I’m rushed today. So here’s a sequence only a plant mother could love: holder, Greeley, Golden, pots, Boulder, Centennial, Westminster, terracotta, climbing, garden, gardening, Loveland, Aurora, Superior, gardener, Louisville, succulents, gardens, Lakewood, yard sale, red clay, cactus, stoneware, tree, pot, planter, fishing, porcelain, Castle Rock, Littleton, plant stand, Brighton, ceramic, grow aloe, mcm, plant, trees, estate sale, planters, Broomfield, cacti, cement, Longmont, monstera, Fort Collins, Erie, ceramics, pottery, Parker, Commerce City, green greenhouse, philodendron, Federal Heights, Denver, vegetable box, Arvada, Northglenn, garage sale, jargon, pottery barn, Wheat Ridge.

*** Absentee plant mothers may be reported to Plant Parenthood ***

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